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- Monkey Monday 2 #16
Monkey Monday 2 #16
The 2nd Annual Banana Awards!
Nathaniel, Rafaella, Parin, Alan A. Monkey, Ashley & Benjamin
29 Dec
Welcome to the second annual Monkey Monday Banana Awards! The absolute MOST prestigious newsletter awards show across this vast galaxy.
Us writers here at Monkey Monday will act as your hosts for this event, presenting the various categories for 2025! In each category, only one nominee will win the coveted Banana Award!
HERE WE GO!
2025 Banana Awards, howling in…
Behold, your first host… Parin, the Voice of the Unemployed!
Best Nate/Parin Animal Picture 2025
Winner(s)
 From Parin |  From Nate |
Nate and I often send each other random Pinterest pictures of animals. These are the two best, one from Nate, and one from me.
What Gets me into the Christmas Spirit 2025
Runner-ups:
• Peppermint
• Weather
• Lights
• Herniating a Disc While Shoveling Snow
• Apparel (Santa hats, Ugly Sweaters)
And the winner is…
Christmas Music!
If you disagree with me, remember you are wrong and I am right.
Our next host, whom we found on the street… Ben, the President of Business!
Sports Moment of the Year 2025
Runner-ups:
• Rory McIlroy Completes Grand Slam
• Shadeur Sanders’ Draft Slide
• Shohei Ohtani NLCS Game 4 Performance
And our Winner for Sports Moment of the Year is…
The Luka Doncic Trade!
The trade of Luka Doncic from the Mavericks to the Lakers was undeniably the most jaw-dropping moment of the 2025 sports world. It was so unprecedented that NOT A SINGLE PERSON actually believed it when it was first announced on Twitter. I still don’t get why a team would trade away the cornerstone of their team man...ope, did I hear someone say Micah Parsons too? Sure would hate to be a Dallas sports fan!
Best Running Bit of 2025
Runner-ups:
• Gurt
• Nine/J.J. McCarthy
• I’m A Grizzly
And the Best Running Bit of 2025 is…
OHHHH IT WAS A DOG!
Not much needs to be said about this...it’s an absolute banger. If you want to get in on this, it’ll make more sense once you watch “A Horse Walks Into A Bar” by BryceAndRobot on YouTube.
Fruit of the Year 2025
Runner-ups:
• Strawberry
• Apple
• Banana
And the Fruit of the Year is…
Pineapple!
The top-rated fruit of the 2020s maintains its run as the top dawg, though Strawberry put up a strong fight this year. Apple is always in the playoffs but struggles to progress past that. And what a display by Banana this year! After being one of the biggest disappointments of 2024, Banana bounced back well. Regardless, Pineapple remains in its run of domination, and it doesn’t seem to be standing down anytime soon.
Rolling up like an armadillo, your next host is… Ashley, the Alpaca Whisperer!
Internet Cat of 2025
Runner-ups:
 Nimbus |  Walter the Cat |
 BaoBao |  Merv the Cat |
And the Internet Cat of 2025 is…
Gumbus!
Just what the internet was made for… cats!!! And these are the ones I’ve been watching!
Tabletop Game (I Played) of 2025
Runner-ups:
• PANIC! At the Dojo
• Battle Lords of the 23rd Century
• Moose Quest
• Cryptid Hunter
And the Winner is…
Seven Voyages of Zylarthen
I’m always looking for cool new games, and there were so many this year, but these left the most impression.
The best, however, is Seven Voyages of Zylarthen. A solidly designed homage to/reimagining of the 1974 edition of Dungeons & Dragons with short, approachable rule books.
New to the awards this year, welcome to the stage… Rafaella, the Rigatoni Revolutionary!
Pasta Shape of 2025
Runner-ups:
• Radiatore
• Shells
• Farfalle
• Linguine
And the Pasta Shape of 2025 is…
Cavatappi!
Different pasta shapes are created for different dishes, places, and cultures. To pick just one I had to consider shape, how it holds sauce (or no sauce!), how versatile it is, and nostalgia. Picking one is no easy feat coupled with my lack of complete pasta knowledge, so please enjoy your pasta how you like.
Math Formula of 2025
Runner-ups:
• Slope of a Line: 𝑦=𝑚𝑥+𝑏 y=mx+b
• Pythagoras Theorem: 𝑎2+𝑏2=𝑐2a2+b2=c2
• Area of a Circle: 𝐴=𝜋𝑟2A=𝜋r2
• Pythagoras Identity: sin2𝛼+cos2𝛼=1sin2𝛼+cos2𝛼=1
And the Winner for Math Formula of 2025 is…
Quadratic Formula!
Disclaimer these formulas are based on my mathematical education that sadly stopped in high school. However, I doubt there are competitors that have a song to accompany them unlike our winner. A classic and vital tool in algebra: the quadratic formula.
And finally, the Clown Prince of the Glorious Viking Realm, the Herald of Paul Bunyan… Nate, the Wise!
Dog of 2025
Nominees:
 Ami |  Atlas |  Bombadil |
 Diana |  Trigeminal |  Yin |
And the Winner for Dog of 2025 is…
MILO???
Mew’ve gato be kitten mew right meow. I did not allow this. I don’t know how he got here. Not only is he a BAD BOY, but he’s not even a dog! This is preposterous! An outrage! But alas, the award has been given. Congrats Milo, you have won the award for Dog of 2025, I guess.
Nate’s Album of 2025
Runner-ups:
• Big Thief - Double Infinity
• Bon Iver - SABLE, fABLE
• DERBY - Slugger
• Dijon - Baby
• Eden - Dark
• Maruja - Pain to Power
• Turnstile - NEVER ENOUGH
• Quadeca - Vanisher, Horizon Scraper
And the Winner for Nate’s Album of 2025 is…
private music by Deftones
This year was crazy for music, and albums I picked out were not at all the only bangers. But I had to give it to Deftones’ private music, which showcased an aged Deftones band back in their prime, after what seemed to be years of declining towards retirement. This album rips. Shoutout music, I love music.
Best Cat Meme of 2025
Runner-ups:
 |  |
 |  |
And the Cat Meme of 2025 is…
Absolute comedic genius by this cat here. The way it uses absurdism to make you create a mental image that acts as the punchline is just superb. I love this one so much. It’s so abstract and funny.
This concludes the second annual Monkey Monday Banana Awards! Thank you all for reading, and being a splendid, handsome audience, we hope you enjoyed.
This issue also wraps up the second season of Monkey Monday. But do not fret, we will be back very soon for Monkey Monday 3!
Once again, we thank you all so much for reading and enjoying Monkey Monday! It can be tough to keep this going during our busy lives, but we make it happen for you guys!
Once again, stay safe, eat some bananas (they are good for you), and we will be back in a few weeks! Love Y’all!
Verse Of The Week
“Let them thank the LorD for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man!”