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- Monkey Monday 2 #11
Hello my young gangsters. It appears to be another Monkey Monday. Things are getting a little rough around here. Milo keeps biting my toes, my girlfriend keeps poking my ribs, my hands are perpetually dry, I didn’t set my alarm on accident and slept till 10:45, missing class, all the food on campus sucks, my dog is overweight, I’m broke and hungry, and worst of all, my Vikings suck!
Oh well, I suppose I can cook up another issue of Monkey Monday for you all, because I just love you all so much.
Monkey Monday 2 #11, dramatically moping in…
Mitch Hedberg
My Goat
Mitch Hedberg is my favorite comedian! I would like to share with you all a little about this dude and why I love him so much.
Born Mitchell Lee Hedberg, on February 24, 1968 in St. Paul, Minnesota, he would go on to be known for his absurd, weird, intelligent, one-liner comedy. I for one, think he is absolutely brilliant. His delivery, his awkward presence, and the jokes themselves are all so perfect, I love him.
I totally recommend checking out this 20 minute special of his so you can hear his delivery, but I’ll share some jokes of his!
That’s my goat right there man. His humor is kind of like a litmus test for intelligence; if you don’t find him funny, it might be saying something about your IQ!
Unfortunately, Mitch had a short career and died young at 37. He was a big time drug user, and died of an accidental drug overdose. Don’t do drugs kids.
So yeah that’s Mitch do yourself a favor and check him out!
-Nate
Pick of the Week
More twang for y’all. I may slowly be transforming into a closeted country music enjoyer. Anyways this week we got Our Mother the Mountain by Townes Van Zandt!
This is a twangy, country-folk record that takes me back to when I would listen to Grandma and Grandpa sing at the coffee shop. This album has some beautifully sweet, romantic songs, like She Came and She Touched Me as well as some reminiscent, longing beauties, such as Like a Summer Thursday.
I don’t have much else to say, this thing slaps. Go check it out!
-Nate
Is It Ripe?
Got another movie review for y’all! This week, we’ve got Ron Howard’s A Beautiful Mind, which hit theaters in 2001. I watched this a couple weeks ago for the first time, and would like to share my findings with you all.
A Beautiful Mind is based on a true story by brilliant mathematician John Nash. We follow his whole life story starting from his first day at Princeton University. We watch as he meets his amazing wife, balancing his top-secret government work with his marriage, and encountering hellish twists and turns.
Without risking revealing too much, his story is both devastating (I started to cry at some moments) but also inspiring. There are some real, painful experiences that many of us may never witness, that brings awareness to real, scary things.
This movie is really good, and heavy, but it’s totally worth the watch.
-Nate
Ripeness: 9.5/10
NINE
I don’t have an interview for y’all this week, BUT I have something worse!
J.J. McCarthy, the young Quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings (check out Monkey Monday 2 #1 for McCarthy lore), has been uh, disappointing to say the least. He recently revealed his game day, bad boy, scary alter-ego he calls “Nine”, named after the number he wears.
“It’s unique and I love feeding that wolf.”
“My fiancé, she doesn’t like when Nine comes home.”
Naturally, I had to get his jersey (Thank you Dad)!
That brings us to today, where the Vikings play the Green Bay Packers! I had a couple of my cheesehead friends over to watch the game with me (I wore my new jersey of course). Unfortunately for me, Nine stepped on the field.
Naturally the broadcast had to point out that my GOAT Nine was absolutely DOMINANT in every important QB category! The great Nine played a fantastic game, and I’m so excited he adorned himself with such an awesome nickname! Here are some highlights from today!
Nine BRAVELY stares down 3 defenders, taking an awesome sack on the 1 yard line!
The next drive, Nine VALIANTLY throws a beautiful pass right to the Packers secondary!
The very next drive, Nine CONFIDENTLY whips the ball directly to another Packer! Amazing!
T’was a wonderful game! I am so glad my team put all of their eggs into the basket of J.J. McCarthy for the next few years, wasting an incredible defense, and the prime of the best wide receiver in the league.
J.J. McCarthy now has NINE turnovers this season! SKOL!
-Nate
Ashley’s Animals
EASTERN GRAY SQUIRREL
Eastern Gray Squirrels weigh between 14-21 ounces, and measure up to 21 inches from their nose to the tip of their tail. They can run 15mph and jump 8 feet high! |  |
Squirrel babies are called kittens, and adults are known to adopt orphaned kittens and where their nests with multiple families of Squirrels in winter. |  |
E.G. Squirrels are able to carry rabies, but rarely do and there have been no documented cases of a human squirrel infecting a human in the United States. |  |
Squirrels are able to climb head-first down a surface, unlike many other animals due, to their unique double jointed ankles that allow them to rotate their feet 180º |  |
E.G. Squirrels bury up to 10k nuts and seeds each year to store for winter. They have been seen burying and digging up their stashes several times a day and even changing locations or digging fake stashes to fool other thieving squirrels who might be spying. -Ashley |  |
Parin’s Proverb
A graham cracker, a marshmallow, and a chocolate walk into a bar. They start a fight. Eventually one of their opponents taunts, "is that all y'all got" In unison they reply, "there's s'more.”
Quan Quotes
“They pay me to play video games. They are dumb.”
Verse Of The Week
For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.